Beam Me Up
|June 1, 1999
GRAND RAPIDS - Well it seems that we have some hot gossip to spread!! Apparently with all of the Star Wars mania unfortunately resurrected from a much deserved death, Eileen has jumped on the bandwagon and can not seem to get enough of this futuristic space fantasy type crap.
She has already seen "Episode 1" more times than my own wife (which is saying something), has taken to calling Winston and Theresa her "little satellites".
I asked Mike if he thought it might be getting a little out of hand, and he sort of avoided the issue in his usual "Hey look, Halley's Comet!!" style, so I knew something must be up.
After being pressed on the issue he was insistently non-forthcoming with any information on what the big secret was regarding Eileen's preoccupation with space sci-fi, other than to say that it was a "personal thing".
Some spying was in order, I thought.
After following them around for a few weeks I finally figured out what it was though, and obtained through my usual source the accompanying photo.
It seems that Eileen has been making Mike wear a mask of her favorite masculine space hero-type in an attempt to, well, vary their recreational diet, so to speak. (Say no more, wink, wink, nudge, nudge...)
How humiliating for Mike though.
No wonder he didn't want to talk about it!!
Oh well, it could be worse. She could have had a thing for Battlestar Galactica's Lorne Greene!! Just imagine!!
No, on second thought, you better not....